I started to wear hijab when I was like 10-12, that was during
the peak year of my puberty. Yup, i reached my puberty quite early. But that’s not
by far the real reason why I started to wear hijab at first. I was ashamed of
my hideous hair. My hair was so ugly that I cannot bare to reveal it to the
public. My intention to wear hijab already crossed out from its original path.
Not because its an obligation, but rather for the sake of looking pretty in
front of the public.
But during those years, there were times when I open up my
hijab and reveal my aurah. If my hair looking pretty that day then I tend not
to wear it. My parents never forced their girls to wear hijab. Don’t get the
wrong idea there. Its not like they don’t care about the obligations in islam
but forcing someone to do something its not the correct way to do. Moreover when
it comes to your children. My parents took the other way round, by indulging us
with their advices on what we supposed to do. My father is a very strong Islam
believer. But there’s saying that” iman tak diwarisi oleh anaknye”. He did all
he can to take us to the right path. Nevertheless, you can pretty much say that
we are not that very obliged children. Poor him.
Back to the story. I was on and off with hijab for around 5
years. Then around 2007, when I was like 15 at that time, then the idea of
wearing hijab fully without taking it off anymore came to me. But that only
applies when I was out in mall etc, not when Im in waterpark or when im at
swimming pool. I stumbled upon some hijabers blogger that kinda hits me back to
reality. Why should I reveal my aurah when im the one who made the decision to
cover it. What the differences in taking it off during pool time and wearing it
back during your day out? Less crowds hence making it less sinner for you? No. The
punishment would still be the same.And now, i can proudly say that i wear one because thats my obligation as a woman and as a muslim. i far from perfection but as a muslim we always have some rooms for improvements.
Maybe the wear im wearing my hijab is not on the par that had been decided in islam. i still need to find another style that will cover my chest. Wearing clothes that do not show the shape of my body. i still have a long way to go :)
I cannot force anyone to cover their aurah. In reference to
this ;
"Patutkah kamu
menyuruh manusia supaya berbuat kebaikan sedang kamu lupa akan diri kamu
sendiri; padahal kamu semua membaca Kitab Allah, tidakkah kamu berakal- Surah
al-Baqarah Ayat 44."
I was
born to be human that not even close to the amal of malaikat, anbiya and
prophets. I still have many loopholes in myself that need to be corrected. Cover
my aurah is one of the step to become a better muslim. In 2012, I want to
improve my sallah, and my amal towards the path to Allah.
My
sister doesn’t wear one though my father had tried his hardest to make her wear
it. Maybe one day, sooner or later, with the power of Allah Almighty, she will
openly cover her aurah in public
.
This
I something I quoted from iluvislam.com.some of the reasons why she decided to
wear hijab and these two grabbed my attention.
“16. A not-hijabed-before
girls will receive compliments and prayers when they start to wear hijab.
People will be happy for them and God is pleased.
17. A hijabed-before girls will receive smiles and silent curses when they started to remove hijab. People will be unhappy because of them and God is not pleased.”
17. A hijabed-before girls will receive smiles and silent curses when they started to remove hijab. People will be unhappy because of them and God is not pleased.”
And
you did know right, that when you say hijab, that’s not just merely wearing a
headscarf. Its about the whole look of the someone who wears it :)
2 comments:
First, I adore your English. Awesome. Second, I adore your spirit. May Allah guide you all the way to His side and may it come as soon as possible.
aww, this post really meaningful. gotcha! <3
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