Tuesday, January 31, 2012


Around a week ago I woke up with 4 missed calls on my hand phone. It was from my best friend, ekyn. I called her back. Excitedly, she told me that she will be going to Japan. I already knew that eventually the time will come. She’s always a bright student. Those kind of students who asking for a smack on their head since they always pass with excellent result even when they told you that they screwed up the exam.

Now she’s gonna further her study. Its her dream. But she will be away from me. Ever since the day I knew her, I always felt like she’s the only person I could lean on. The one whom I feel comfortable shed tears with. The one who could handle my flaws though sometimes it can be overbearing. She sucked up with it. I’m thankful to have her by my side. The thought of her would be away from me, scares the hell out of me. Japan and Malaysia. Though we are called Asian countries, but the distance is seriously a no joke for me. I can call her anytime I want if we in Malaysia but when she reach japan, it will be hard for me to contact her.
Who would I call when I could longer hold the burden in my heart? For the past few years,it would always be her. She the only person who would never complain and listen to my problems. She’s the only person who knew why I acted in certain ways. I will miss her. A lot.

We are an abnormal best friend. We rarely meet each other. Once in a while I would go to UM to meet her, or going out to watch movies and stuff. But that’s very rare. We both knew ourselves better. Typical best friend and us doesn’t match that well. We were always together during high school years.  We did everything a best friend would do. So maybe since we already had everything done hence its okay to stay this way.

The separation would be hard. We only appreciate something when its no longer with us. Maybe this distance will make me appreciate you more. To embrace the warm you gave me for the past 4 years.thanks for being my bestfriend. You know that im a spoilt child kan? So do you. I really hate this mushy talk and whatnot when with you. Haha. But hey, sape tak sedih kalau orang yang die sayang jauh dari die. Abah pergi mekah seminggu pon aku nangis macam orang gile. Apatah lagi kau yang selama ni dengan aku nak pergi bertahun. Ni aku bole tabah lagi. Kalau sungguh kau dah sampai sane, mau aku gile meroyan kat KL. Haha.

Ekyn, kau tau aku sayang kau kan :)


Monday, January 30, 2012

The Monday Blues


Friday, January 20, 2012

Why I wear Hijab

I started to wear hijab when I was like 10-12, that was during the peak year of my puberty. Yup, i reached my puberty quite early. But that’s not by far the real reason why I started to wear hijab at first. I was ashamed of my hideous hair. My hair was so ugly that I cannot bare to reveal it to the public. My intention to wear hijab already crossed out from its original path. Not because its an obligation, but rather for the sake of looking pretty in front of the public.

But during those years, there were times when I open up my hijab and reveal my aurah. If my hair looking pretty that day then I tend not to wear it. My parents never forced their girls to wear hijab. Don’t get the wrong idea there. Its not like they don’t care about the obligations in islam but forcing someone to do something its not the correct way to do. Moreover when it comes to your children. My parents took the other way round, by indulging us with their advices on what we supposed to do. My father is a very strong Islam believer. But there’s saying that” iman tak diwarisi oleh anaknye”. He did all he can to take us to the right path. Nevertheless, you can pretty much say that we are not that very obliged children. Poor him.

Back to the story. I was on and off with hijab for around 5 years. Then around 2007, when I was like 15 at that time, then the idea of wearing hijab fully without taking it off anymore came to me. But that only applies when I was out in mall etc, not when Im in waterpark or when im at swimming pool. I stumbled upon some hijabers blogger that kinda hits me back to reality. Why should I reveal my aurah when im the one who made the decision to cover it. What the differences in taking it off during pool time and wearing it back during your day out? Less crowds hence making it less sinner for you? No. The punishment would still be the same.And now, i can proudly say that i wear one because thats my obligation as a woman and as a muslim. i far from perfection but as a muslim we always have some rooms for improvements.

Maybe the wear im wearing my hijab is not on the par that had been decided in islam. i still need to find another style that will cover my chest. Wearing clothes that do not show the shape of my body. i still have a long way to go :)

I cannot force anyone to cover their aurah. In reference to this ;
"Patutkah kamu menyuruh manusia supaya berbuat kebaikan sedang kamu lupa akan diri kamu sendiri; padahal kamu semua membaca Kitab Allah, tidakkah kamu berakal- Surah al-Baqarah Ayat 44."

I was born to be human that not even close to the amal of malaikat, anbiya and prophets. I still have many loopholes in myself that need to be corrected. Cover my aurah is one of the step to become a better muslim. In 2012, I want to improve my sallah, and my amal towards the path to Allah.

My sister doesn’t wear one though my father had tried his hardest to make her wear it. Maybe one day, sooner or later, with the power of Allah Almighty, she will openly cover her aurah in public
This I something I quoted from iluvislam.com.some of the reasons why she decided to wear hijab and these two grabbed my attention.
“16. A not-hijabed-before girls will receive compliments and prayers when they start to wear hijab. People will be happy for them and God is pleased.
17. A hijabed-before girls will receive smiles and silent curses when they started to remove hijab. People will be unhappy because of them and God is not pleased.”

And you did know right, that when you say hijab, that’s not just merely wearing a headscarf. Its about the whole look of the someone who wears it :)


Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Abang Kassim dah Selamat.

And finally, its over. Alhamdulillah.

Dah selamat dah jawab paper final and now dah selamat bergomol-gomol dengan katil kesayangan dirumah sungguhpon tak selamat habis kemas barang lagi. Bab unpack barang ni yang aku lemah. Sudahnye dah selamat habis cuti semester ni aku bawak je barang barang tu balik. Senang cerita kan macam tu? Banyak ayat selamat aku dalam perenggan ni.

Tapi, aku masih tak selamat. Bila mengenangkan bahawasanya tiada paper yang bole buat aku hela nafas lega buat aku rase macam nak nangis. Hati cekal ni eventho mase bukak je first page of the paper then suddenly I felt like my whole brain switched off from functioning. The questions for all the papers were so hard that i wish to flush up my brain since It became useless during the exams. I totally would cry If I pass this sem. Pray for me.

Takpe. i still have some faith that i gonna pass this sem.

Oh btw, sesungguhnye mawar tu tak mahukan aku lagi. Dibuangnye aku merempat diluar. So yeah, aku dengan selamatnya akan menjadi non resident for the next sem. Means, no more coupons to be collected for the sake of getting a place in the college. Rumah pon dah jumpe. Duit booking pon dah dibayar. Tinggal agreement and letak barang sahaja.  

Ape lagi nak cerita eh? Oh kite dah ade pakwe. Pakwe kite hensem gile. Dah la hensem, kaye pulak tu. Die ade kereta hebat punye. Huhuhu. Rindu pakwe kite. Pakwe kite selalu kasi kite mesej sweet sweet yang buat kite rase nak lempang.

Ok joke. Forever alone je yang layak buat joke macam ni.

Oh btw haritu joe, my friend buat lame joke dalam kereta;

Joe: Tasya, aku pon banyak jerawat tapi aku ade makwe.
Aku : siyes aku rase nak campak kau keluar kereta.

Kata kata seperti diatas buat aku rasa aku layak dapat award forever alone selamanya. Jage kau joe. Aku pergi jumpe specialist, hilang jerawat, aku pergi ngorat budak engine. Biar diam kau jangan menganjing aku dah. Haha.

dan sesungguh tiada abang kassim dalam cerita ni sebab aku tak pernah kenal mane mane abang kassim pon. tajuk diberi semasa otak tidak berfungsi. sekian.


Sunday, January 1, 2012

MY 2012

Happy new year guys!

I really want to update this blog but due to the lack of time and lack of ideas on what to write, i just left it un-updated. So hows your new year? Mine was boring as it should be. last year I celebrated it with my fellow friends at hostel while enjoying a cup of maggi, and this year I celebrated it at home, with all the books and notes. BORING.

I read other bloggers blogged about their new year’s resolution and whatnot. But I don’t have any of that, since I knew if I had such resolutions, they are never going to work. I want to enjoy 2012 as it is. Im in my 20’s now. Should I be happy for that? Orang cakap dah boleh kahwin dah, tapi kalau nak kahwin kene ade calon. Masalahnye sekarang, bukan takat takde calon, orang yang nak kat aku pon tade. Okay down, tayah kahwin la macam ni. jap, sekarang aku dah lari topic.

Kalau ade resolution pon maybe aku nak pass every semester with 3.00. at least. I don’t want to repeat any semester just because I don’t do well in exams. I hate failure and im afraid of it. I need to clear my thoughts. Right now, its like a whole clutter inside this big brain of mine. Exams, family, love life (as if I have one ==’) and everything. Nak result elok kene ade otak yang elok. Supaya bile aku jawab exams nanti otak aku tak merawang pergi tempat laen. Sesunggguhnye otak dan fikiran aku tak bole duduk diam. Nampak abang hensem ala ala mantap sikit mata dah ke laen. Nampak lecturer yang ala ala hot macam aaron aziz dah bayang nak buat calon. Okay kau over tasya.

Oh tambah satu lagi la macam ni. aku nak kahwin. Bole? Haha.